Registered: Feb 2001
Location: Riverside, CA
Posts: 1379

my lifemare.

it sucks, when you have to do anything for money. at $9/hr, you can't really barter for something better, when it's the best you've come across.

I'm in debt to 3rd parties by $1300 (all will be payed off next month, WOOT!), but I feel like I've sold my soul. I've been hired to do something everyone of you hate.

telemarketing.

please, if a telemarketer calls your home, PLEASE for the sake of cheebus PLEASE bitch them out.

That way I can call my manager over, and have him sit through it. I'm full time, so I'm sure I can get the company on some method of employee endangerment.

it will help me out, especially if it ends in a $50,000 lawsuit that I win.

Almost anything to get the benjamins. then again, I am evil natured.

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Ooooooooo.....I loathe telemarketers.......split the settlement with me and I'll do the bitching.

(Usually I just give the phone to the 3 year old.)

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Dogma kills.

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Save yourself from this terrible fate! You'll find a knife in the kitchen.

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Registered: Jul 2001
Location: Glasgow, Scotland
Posts: 882

Ways to piss off a telesales person;

1/ If they ask how you are, go into length on your recent haemmeroids operation and the afteraffects.
2/ Insist it's your mate Dave playing the parnk "Come on Dav,e I know it's you".
3/ Repeat every word they say
4/ Pretend you don't speak english, and misunderstand every word they say. Even better, turn normal sounding phrases or words into rude, badly pronounced insults.
5/ When you answer the phone, say 'Somethings come up - I'll call you back', and slam down the phone. If you're really bored, and they're on commission, do this immediately before they request payment details.
6/ Alternatively, ask them for their credit card details and address. When they protest, say "now you know how it feels!" and hang up.
7/ Answer the phone as if you are working in a dodgy shop - i.e. "Hello, Jim's House o' Love. If you can stick it in you, you can buy it here!". Especially good if they are a trainee being recorded
8/Hold an electric razor to the phone and keep on shouting "What! I can't hear you!" Every now and then, insit it's a problem on their end of the line. Hopefully, you can make them shout, so their next phone call results in them instinctively yelling at the customer.
9/ Pretend to be telesales engineer at the same firm, and then proceed to tell them off for their poor technique.

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Hit it 'til it gives up....

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[URL=http://www.3dap.com/hlp/hosted/reciprocity/casualtiesofwar/main.htm]Casualties of War[/URL]
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Registered: Feb 2001
Location: Riverside, CA
Posts: 1379

hmm aldo... excellent tips. all evadable

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Nah just say "bye" and put the phone down.

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You think you're bad off? I'm about £5k in debt, and I've got another 2 years of Uni.... and an interview to become an 'Ambient Replenishment Operator' (shelfstacker).

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Hit it 'til it gives up....

[URL=http://www.3dap.com/hlp/hosted/reciprocity]RECIPROCITY[/URL] [URL=http://www.3dap.com/hlp/hosted/reciprocity/demo.html]The Luyten Incident[/URL]
[URL=http://www.3dap.com/hlp/hosted/reciprocity/casualtiesofwar/main.htm]Casualties of War[/URL]
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Registered: Aug 2001
Location: Imperial Palace, Coruscant
Posts: 272

I work in Retail Procurement and Logistics. (Read: grocery store clerk.)

I loathe telemarketers. My father shares (or shared; they moved out today) his office with a telemarketing business. It was hellish--one time the landlord was called down to the police office because someone's 14 year old son was buying drugs from one of the telemarketers in the parking lot.

I love Jim's House 'O' Love! Some other fun greetings:
Roadkill cafe. You kill it, we grill it!
Frank's abortion clinic. You rape 'em, we scrape 'em!
Bob's discount morgue. You stab 'em, we slab 'em!

Okay... those were tasteless. I apologize to everyone who will be offended.

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Registered: Feb 2001
Location: Riverside, CA
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you may be as glad as I am, as I kindly told my manager to stick "this phone as far up your ****ing ass as possible. and dont forget the $ you owe me. I'll be on my way, thank you, and goodbye."

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quote:

---

Originally posted by GalacticEmperor
Roadkill cafe. You kill it, we grill it!

---

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quote:

---

Originally posted by GalacticEmperor
Frank's abortion clinic. You rape 'em, we scrape 'em!

---

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Registered: Jun 2002
Location: Humid, TX
Posts: 250

You're all sick.

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Dogma kills.

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Registered: Feb 2001
Location: Riverside, CA
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damn straight, but at least at my NEW job, I'll get transferred straight into the IT division once the new office opens. (Got hired, again).

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Please Note: Brando switches jobs at least once a week.

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Location: Riverside, CA
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call me evil, but i go where the money (and pleasure) goes.



(wow, this sure beats working at a theatre!!!)

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quote:

---

Originally posted by Orange
Please Note: Brando switches jobs at least once a week.

---

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quote:

---

Originally posted by Brando
(wow, this sure beats working at a theatre!!!)

---

What? Being a Telemarketer? Oh... probably.

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Read: Brando gets fired at least once a week.

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Registered: Feb 2001
Location: Riverside, CA
Posts: 1379

naw, that should be:
brando tells his managers to Fvck off, hence is not on the schedule the following day.

I am not a telemarketer, ornage.

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Registered: Dec 2000
Location: Jerusalem, Israel
Posts: 928

Bah - any telemarketers call up here and I just give a very loud, wet-sounding belch and hang up.

(where's that HLP ;7 smiley??)

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