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Posted by cece on 08-18-2002 03:17 PM:

New Element Discovered!

A major research institution (MRI?) has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest chemical element yet known to science. The new element has been tentatively named "Governmentium ".

Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 11 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of governmentium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would normally take less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause some morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as "Critical Morass". You will know it when you see it.

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Posted by Shark on 08-18-2002 04:18 PM:

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LALALALALALALALALALALA - I'm so mature :)


Posted by Brando on 08-18-2002 06:39 PM:

har har har... how fooney.

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Posted by F S W on 08-19-2002 05:46 PM:

Clever. Where did you get it?


Posted by IceFire on 08-19-2002 08:39 PM:

Awesome! I like the peon's and moron's part

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Posted by cece on 08-20-2002 01:56 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by F S W
Clever. Where did you get it?


My Mommy gave it to me.

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Posted by Shrike on 08-20-2002 02:05 PM:

So are you new VW staff?

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Posted by Orange on 08-20-2002 03:33 PM:

Yes, Captain Obvious.

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Posted by FSF Ashrak on 08-20-2002 08:57 PM:

Unhappy

and i didnt get into BB staff as mod

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Posted by Brando on 08-21-2002 12:23 AM:

sorry ashrak... i'm doing the hiring and i didnt get an email from you at all...

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Posted by Shrike on 08-21-2002 12:44 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Orange
Yes, Captain Obvious.
Well, I thought about 'Who are you' but it's been overused...

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Posted by cece on 08-21-2002 04:31 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Shrike
Well, I thought about 'Who are you' but it's been overused...


quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by Shrike
So are you new VW staff?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

LOL......I'm a survivor of the VBB.

I play RF CTF to a degree of perfection in a team setting.

I'm just this wierd old lady who has gamed since the beginning of games......and found herself completely hooked by Red Faction.

I remember Pong.

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Posted by Alphakiller on 08-21-2002 07:44 PM:

Remember pong? Hell, I played that at the end of last school year!
We had an Atari 2600 in the hallway, it was awesome.

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Posted by tomcat on 08-22-2002 10:21 AM:

Whee!

When where you born Alpha? Last centurY? 1950?)

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Posted by [TF]Vixtran on 08-23-2002 04:16 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Alphakiller
Remember pong? Hell, I played that at the end of last school year!
We had an Atari 2600 in the hallway, it was awesome.



heehh I loved it, also Atari..gesh to think games were only 2d.

As for the element,
I think you are wrong. There is a even stronger and more ductile element called womanite. I heard that womanite is made out of loosely orbiting electron with a strong inner core called illtakeurmoneite. The combination of the two make womanite extremely magnetic to men. The orbiting electron some how attaches itself to men and leeches with the illtakeurmoneite atom.

After attached for a while, it falls off its host and becomes wifeite. Now wifeite is extremely volatile. We the slightest verbal mention of you leveling the premises, it begins a violent transformation into cuttinoffite. Now cuttinoffite can be tragically detrimental to a mans well being. This can be cured though, if the man has another womanite attached.

However this is not recommended, Needless to say wifeite and womanite do not mix at all and could possibly bring on a nuclear reaction.

dang im tired

PEACE

BTW nothing against women I love em lol


Posted by Shrike on 08-23-2002 09:32 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Alphakiller
Remember pong? Hell, I played that at the end of last school year!
We had an Atari 2600 in the hallway, it was awesome.

Wow, did you have to feed it pennies? Or hand-crank it?

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Posted by cece on 08-23-2002 02:50 PM:

I loved Atari.

Pong ate quarters. Lots and lots of quarters.

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Posted by Thorn on 08-23-2002 07:18 PM:

In other scientific news..

Scientists have discovered the smallest particle.. Jean Cretiens political future....

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Posted by Alphakiller on 08-23-2002 09:29 PM:

No, we flipped the power switch.
And yes, the Atari was probably about as old as I am, but it was still working!

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Posted by Shrike on 08-23-2002 09:33 PM:

Re: In other scientific news..

quote:
Originally posted by Thorn
Scientists have discovered the smallest particle.. Jean Cretiens political future....
Mwah ha ha!

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WE ARE HARD LIGHT PRODUCTIONS. YOU WILL LOWER YOUR FIREWALLS AND SURRENDER YOUR COMPUTERS. WE WILL ADD YOUR INTELLECTUAL AND VERNACULAR DISTINCTIVENESS TO OUR OWN. YOUR FORUM WILL ADAPT TO SERVICE US. RESISTANCE IS FUTILE.


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