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Volition Watch
Registered: Jul 2000
Location: I am everywhere, and I am nowhere.
Posts: 1184 |
FreeSpace: The Vasudans have invaded!
Alright, now before you go further in your FreeSpace news, I must tell you a sad tale...
While I was walking to the Quick-E-Mart today, I saw a large dark man stepping out of his van, with golden chains around his neck, he said: "Yo! You that Ace foo at FS Watch?"
I hesistantly replied after gulping my slurpee: "Umm... yes.... I think so..."
The man then handed me a manilla folder and said: "I pitty you foo, call me Deep Throat, and this is for you. Now don't let that crazy foo Murdock hear about this..."
As soon as the folder was thrust into my hand, he vanished back into his van, which seemed hella-fast....
Upon returning home, I opened the folder, it contained a floppy disk with several files within it, as well as a text file, I opened the files and discovered the shocking truth.
The Vasudans have invaded, they have been among us for a long time, and now Volition Inc., creators of quality games, are a part of this.
For my fist evidence of this, witness Deep Throat's pitcure of Mike Kulas finalizing funding of the FreeSpace series:
Yes, Interplay is not infact behind FreeSpace's funding, but Al Gore! (What else could explain it's being top CNet download for four weeks! What it's being a good game? impossible!) It clearly appears that the Clinton Administration is behind this as well as seen below!
Yes, it appears that on the behalf of the United Nations, our president is signing Earth away to the Vasudan Parliamentary Empire!
What does this have to do with Volition? Clearly our 'allies' within the great war are infact an elaborate cover-up to help society believe that the Vasudans are not real, and that they are our allies.
Why is this clearly true? The headz jokes, the sheer lack of fighting Vasudans in the great war and the convenience that it's the GTA that was at first unwilling for a cease-fire, as well as Lt. Alex McCarthy's motives... Also simply look at how "atrocious" Aken Bosch is, clearly it's a set-up!
Stay tuned for further proof of this invasion in the coming days as I attempt to find the truth in the files of Deep Throat...
Note: The contents of the images and text above are fictious, if they were real they'd be even more cheesy!
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07-28-2000 05:42 AM
